


Will It Be Ok?

by Clc129



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:40:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25398550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clc129/pseuds/Clc129
Summary: Harry has a sudden realization. Will everything work out?
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Harry Potter
Comments: 1
Kudos: 43





	Will It Be Ok?

**Author's Note:**

> Ok. Boredom (ha, see what I did there?) and maybe a tab bit of liquid courage is clearly getting the best of me.
> 
> Let me know if I should hit the delete button on this one. I swear I won’t be mad at it.

He doesn’t know what or when it happened. What he does know is he can’t shake it now. 

Just standing there at the burrow, like every other Sunday, he notices her. He noticed her all the time, sure, she was his best friend after all. But more importantly today, he notices she’s his. In whatever way that means. She’s his Hermione.His best friend. His home. Dedicated, intelligent, brave, strong, beautiful. His bushy haired know it all. His Hermione. 

Her sacrifices hurt his heart. There’s no denying that and the guilt of it hits him everyday. But that complicated and conflicting space in him still loves her for it. How could he not? She’s been there, for him, regardless of everything. How could he not love her for that. Clearly, he figures, she loves him too. He hopes anyway, as love isn’t something he’s well versed in. But if this isn’t love what could it be? Many smart, brave, intelligent, strong people helped him do the hardest thing in the world. They didn’t all do it because they love him though. They believed in him, of course, and the cause and he’s ok with that. But that’s not love. Is it? 

Ron loves him too he realizes. But this...THIS is a different kind of love. A love he didn’t know what to do with. Two best friends, but two different kinds of love. Neither is anything to scoff at and he’s eternally grateful to have both of them and wouldn’t trade either one for anything in the world. But it’s different nonetheless. 

Now his head is in his hands as he sits there. 

What feeling is this? 

He loved someone else. Sitting there on a bench, watching everyone he loves enjoy each other’s company, he tries reassuring himself. His heart belongs to Ginny. Ginny loves him, he loves her. They haven’t officially gotten back together but he knew they would eventually. But then why was he asking himself?

He’s never had a sister, he reasons. Maybe that’s why he can’t place how he loves her. He’s never had a sister. That must be it. His sister.

As that particular thought enters his brain his stomach turns. 

He realizes then that she’s not his sister. He realizes he doesn’t want her to be his sister.  
His stomach turns again. This time from guilt and shame. What is he doing? How can he do this? He can’t do this. He shouldn’t do this. It will hurt people. He doesn’t want to hurt them. He never wanted to hurt anybody.

Another, equally horrifying, thought occurs. Maybe she thinks of HIM as her brother. Can he live with that? Yes he can. He doesn’t want to but he’s not letting go for anything. He will fill whatever role in her world she needs him to. It’s only fair of course, hadn’t she been doing that for years? 

Someone takes a seat next to him.

“I’ve been watching you. What’s going on?” 

Startled, he looks up and it’s her. His Hermione.

“YOU have been watching ME?” He asks befuddled.

She laughs. What a lovely laugh. He immediately chides himself for that with a subtle grimace on his face. 

She notices but continues, “Well you started it. You’ve been staring at me.” 

He chuckles. “Sorry, just had a lot on my mind lately.” 

“Understandable, it’s weird to just breath without the threat of death looming isn’t it?” A faint smile graces her lips as she grabs his hand.

“I don’t know what to do with myself these days.” He returns the pained smile. 

“Whatever you want, isn’t that the point? Just live our lives however we want now?” Her grip on his hand tightens for a moment.

“I don’t think I know what I want. Even if I did...” he shrugs.

She looks at him fondly but with a pinch of sadness.

“I say you do what you want Harry. If anyone deserves to live the life they want it’s you.”

“I’m tired of hurting and disappointing people. I don’t want to anymore.” Suddenly he finds that tree in the distance very interesting.

“The people who truly love you will never begrudge you finding happiness Harry. You know that.” She replies turning his head back toward her with a hard stare. 

That stare does everything it needed to.

“It’s not what I want...I—I think it’s who I want.” He hangs his head in shame.

Again, she lifts him back up to eye level.

“Who do you want Harry?” The corners of her mouth lifting slightly.

“It...it doesn’t matter. I can’t have them. It’s not fair to everyone. I can’t have them. But I’ll be ok.” 

“You might be right. But eventually you’ll be just fine and hopefully very happy.” 

“How can you be so sure?” His eyes now brimming with tears and hope.

“Because.” She says assuredly then continues. 

“Because, I’m almost sure that if that person wants the same thing...if that is the case, I’m sure the people who love you will be ok with it. Because we all love you.” 

This time when she lifts his eyes back to her she leans in to make her point. 

“There’s something to being a know it all you know.” A broad grin immediately replaces her look of concern. 

Then to HIS surprise, her hand doesn’t move from his chin as she leans in and soothes all his thoughts.

It was a soft brief and gentle kiss. It was everything he could have hoped for. In that moment he knew it was everything he didn’t know he was missing.

He never had hope. He had it now. Everything was going to be ok. 

She was his.


End file.
